Do you live and die by the rules you create? If so, you are so hardcore. I pretend to be, so I make these rules that I think ministers and student leaders will abide by and then something happens and I’m like, “Eh, that’s okay.” I know yesterday I talked a little bit about the tension between lazy ministers and high expectations but in reality there is a question to that whole scenario:
Where Do You Bend Your Own Rules?
I know bosses who have zero tolerance for incompetence and mistakes (at least that’s what they say), but is that right? And then on the other extreme there are the leaders I know that believe in 2nd, 3rd, 100th chances, they just don’t want to give up on someone, but then again is that right? To some it might be a fine line, to others it’s pretty clear. Here are my thoughts:
Here’s when you should be tough:
When Something Is Immoral – While you may want to forgive them (depending on the degree), some type of discipline should be taken. If you don’t then you are saying certain sin has no consequences.
When Your Leadership Is Undermined – Not everyone has to agree with you, but if they slander you publicly it shows they don’t respect you.
Here’s when you should be soft:
When Mistakes Are Made – We’re human, we need mercy when we screw up. If someone makes an honest, genuine mistake they probably need our love more than our finger in their face.
When Life Happens – If they become overwhelmed and struggle to serve it’s not a time to question their loyalty, instead it’s a time to give them grace and tell them, “It’s okay, take a season off and come back when you are ready.”
Now, how you discipline in each case depends on you. I don’t know about you but I don’t think there’s one approach that fits all, nor should we come off that way. When we make absolute statements, then we find ourselves bound. We need to show our ministers that we take what we do seriously; however, understand that plans will change.
Where do you bend your own rules?
Are there any rules that should not be bent?